Archive for families

Ten things that drive bitchy mommy crazy

Posted in 1, Family, Ranting with tags , , , , , on October 30, 2008 by bloggingmom67

Sorry, folks, I’m in a particularly bitchy mood. So I’ll take a break from my political ranting to just rant in general.

I just returned from a PTO meeting, checked my e-mail and am taking a quick computer break before I launch into laundry. To relieve my angst, I’m listing 10 things that drive me crazy — or at least 10 things that drive me crazy at this moment. (In total, there’s really more than 10 things that drive me crazy.)

  1. People who like to “assign” you tasks or suggest things but never offer to do any of them.
  2. People who don’t know how to merge in traffic, so they stop dead mid-lane, clogging everyone and nearly causing a crash.
  3. People who pretend they are helping you when they really “have their own agenda.”
  4. People who think they know what you’re saying without even listening to you.
  5. People who tell you how you should feel or think or what should bother you. (Guess what, folks, I don’t need your permission to be peeved or hurt or embarrassed.)
  6. When the kids continually hide as I’m trying to get them to bed. (It’s funny once, twice, OK, maybe three times. But by the fifth time, I’m sorry, you’re driving me nuts!)
  7. Disorganized people who don’t realize they are disorganized. (Perhaps they believe the whole world runs in a chaotic frenzy.)
  8. People who make their incompetence your emergency.
  9. People who cut in front of you in line or cut you off in traffic.
  10. Mean people who never admit they are wrong.

Ahh. I feel much better now.


Ever wish you could have a ‘do over’?

Posted in Family with tags , on October 13, 2008 by bloggingmom67

I admit it. I had a tantrum, just like a child. Now I didn’t fall to the floor and kick my feet. Mine was more of an oral tantrum, but the result was I acted like a baby.

It all began Saturday morning. My hubby was upset with me about something that I think wasn’t my fault. I thought he was acting childish in blaming me. So what did I do? Turned into a wee one, too.

He tends to retreat when angry; I tend to advance. So here were, two 41-year-old adults acting about as mature as our children, ages 8 and 6. He was ignoring me; I was yelling louder and louder. Now he didn’t stick his fingers in his ears and say “Nah, nah, I can’t hear you” but he might as well. I got just as angry at him as my daughter does when my son acts like my hubby. (That’s the thing about genes; you see your own faults — and strengths — in your kids.)

And I broke all the rules of “good arguments.” I made those sweeping statemtents – “you never, you always” when I really meant “one time you …” I also brought up past, long past, battles, which is never fair.

It wasn’t one of my finer moments. I have a quote from Deepak Chopra pasted to my fridge, and when I listen to it, all goes much better. It reads:  

When you struggle with your partner, you are struggling with yourself. Every fault you see in them touches a denied weakness in yourself. Every conflict you wage is an excuse not to face a conflict within.

Another author, not sure who, put an equally telling message in simpler terms: “When you’re wrong, apologize; when you’re right, shut up.”

Both sentiments are so true because when I quarrel, particularly with someone I love, I seldom seem to be arguing about whatever is the subject of the fight. It’s really about something deeper, something related to my own fears, something maybe having nothing to do with the person.

In this case, I think I misdirected my anger at my hubby because there are other parts of my life where I feel powerless. He’s an easy target because he did something that ticked me off. I am Bitchy Mommy, after all. 

That isn’t to say, he did nothing wrong. I think he could have handled things differently, too, but I can control only me. Likely, if he were reading this, he’d say I’m overthinking it all. A fight is just a fight.

Maybe that’s true. But, honey, if you are reading this. I’m sorry. I really think you’re a wonderful husband, which is why I expect so much.

Boy, I wish I could just have a “do over.”

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